Learning to Do it Alone

Deliveries.

Billings.

Photographing work.

Fixing the dryer.

Cutting out the wood.

Repairing the weed eater.

Just a few of the things i did this week.

I do not cringe at the thought of hard work.

I do not believe in "gender specific jobs" around the house.

I do not shy away from power tools.

For the past several years; however -

my husband managed many of those tasks.

Because i have an 8-5 day job -

he managed the business end of the art business.

He also handled the behind the scenes part of each piece -

he cut and prepped and sealed and delivered.

But he is no longer here to do those things.

He has chose to leave and with him leaving -

he also took with him the support for my business that I relied on.

I have not had to regularly do some of the tasks that i need to do now.

I have found myself having to keep many more balls in the air than usual.

This has brought a great sense of accomplishment.

It has also brought up new emotions . . .

fear, frustration, anger, hurt, betrayal and exhaustiion.

Recently -

I had an order that was due to a local store.

I had to do the art work as usual.

But I also had to negotiate getting the wood cut and prepped, sealing the finished art, creating the invoice, completing the delivery . . .

It required reblancing my time.

It required asking for help from family members (who didn't disappoint, by the way).

I had never made a delivery to this place before.

I felt even more emotions - panic being one of them.

Where do I go? Who do I talk to?

It required a new level of expectation and a new normal.

And although I felt all of those emotions . . .many of which I didn't like feeling -

it also brought up an emotion I didn't expect - PRIDE.

I did it!

With the help of awesome family members - i did it.

And it confirmed to me - I can do it.



Mid-morning.

A walk with my dog.

The rain fell most of the night.

but the morning had been washed clean and the clouds were sharing the the space with bright blue.

The bright blue pickets seemed to line the way for me.

I felt inclined to find a stick and run them along the boards.

 Morning droplets clung to the rose petals.

They looked like beautiful diamonds.

I even reverted to my childhood and couldn't resist a good splash in a puddle or two.



At the end of my walk,

I felt clear and rejuventated.

Ready to approach the many things that needed to be done.

And once again, I felt a greater appreciation for all the beauty that surrounds us .. .



Laundry Rules

A new commission piece . . .

laundry rules.

This order is for a family who regularly hosts Japanese exchange students.

This 12 x 20 custom piece will hang beautifully on the wall of a laundry room.

I smiled when asked to do this piece.

Knowing it was for a home with exchange students, I understood fully.

For several years, our family hosted over 10 year-long exchange students.

Most of our students were japanese,

but we also had students from Korea and Brazil.

I was humbled to think that the parents of these students had sent them a different country.

Many of the students we hosted were only 16.

They came to stay with us for a whole year.

And we were chosed to take care of them, teach them and love them.

And love them we did.

Our family grew and grew as we hosted students.

Each time a new student joined our family,

we had to teach these 16 year olds how to do many basic household chores.

Laurdry was one of those.

We also taught them

How to do the dishes;

How to clean a bathroom;

We worked with them as they learned to appreciate our food.

We taught them how to use our American showers.

We also learned much from them.

We learned how to be comfortable with silence.

We learned to try new foods.

We learned about different cultures and different traditions.

We learned that buddist and christian beliefs have many similarities.

And in the process, we learned that even though many things were different -

we are all still humans with emotions, and hopes and dreams.

Milestones

Collin Davis Miller.

My son.

My second born.

He came into this world on his own terms.

He loves puzzles - has ever since he was 3.

He loves to play games.

He hates television.

He loves to garden.

It took him 4 years before he began talking in a language that we could all understand.

His older sister understood his language and acted as his translator for almost a year.

He often took himself to bed when he was a toddler.

His favorite "toys" were blocks, legos, and anything he could "build" with.

He would spend hours building entire village scenes with these.

If there is a fire - whether camping, in a woodstove or in the backyard fire pit -

he can't resist the urge to poke it.

He loved to read and be read to.

We read all sorts of books together when he was young. . .

He loved to play with rockets.

He loved to help me in the kitchen.

He gave us a unending source of pride . . .and headache!

He was the child that made my heart stop on multiple occasions.

Like when he got knocked over by a neighborhood dog and was unconcious for a short time when he was 4.

Or when I got a call from the school that he broke his finger while wrestling with a friend at recess.

Or when he split his forehead open innertubing on the river with friends and needed to get 14 stitches.

He has always been willing to take on a challenge - especially if money and pride is on the line.

Like shaving his head for $100 when he let his hair grow long and was a giant fluff ball of frizz. (By the way - I didn't pay him the money - but a respected youth leader did.)

Or when he ate a fat earth worm while we were gardening one spring for $5.

He has eaten bugs, and raw fish and all sorts of disgusting things on a dare from friends.

And this last weekend . . .

he graduated from College.

And he got his first job in the "real" world which he will begin in a matter of days.

I don't think he could have been any happier on this day . . .

With the love of his life . . .

With 2 of his 3 sisters . . .because us Miller's don't believe in stuffy photos.

And now Collin . . .it's time to move on to the next adventure.

I think it is going to be a good one!