Friday, September 7, 2012

Happy Birthday To Me . . .

Yes! It is my birthday today.
A hard day during a normal year.
Particularly different this year.
Not only is today my birthday - a day that would normally be spent celebrating with my (soon-to-be-ex) husband -
but tomorrow is our "legal" anniversary.
However -
I am surprisingly happy and filled with hope and excitement.
Yesterday was a hard day.
It seemed that everywhere I went and everyone I talked to led me down a path of dredging up unhappy thoughts.
I admit - I shed some tears last night.
But then I called a friend.
We talked. I vented. I cried some more.
And then we laughed.
And by the time I hang up - the cloud was starting to lift.
And today, I awoke to the sound of birds.
I felt as if I was moving in the right direction.
I felt light and happy.
I sang songs and danced in my room as I got ready for work.
I am looking forward to festivities planned for the weekend with friends and family.
I feel joy.
Not just happy - but JOY!
Something I have not felt in many, many years.
Ironic, right?
The way we adjust our version of normal.
And then when the change happens - and we see and feel the change - we recognize what we had been missing.
It has taken one of the most emotional, hard experiences of my life to lead me to joy.
So here's to me and a new year. New routines. New adventures.
My first started with my trip to California that I have just returned from.
My next adventure will come later in this month - a road trip up into Washington for a weekend to see a concert of my all-time favorite vocal jazz group.
Other things on my horizon -
I WILL sky dive.
I will engage in a zipline adventure somewhere.
I will go white-water rafting.
I am starting the planning process for a trip to Italy.
All of these will be first time adventures.
I want another road trip - this time to Yellowstone - a place I lived in my early 20's and haven't returned to since.
I am working on changes for my business - new changes that make me excited.
I am looking for ways to take care of myself and giving myself permission to let unimportant things go.
I am moving forward.
So watch out world - Laurie Miller is back and excited!
Here is to a new year. And new adventures.

1 comment:

Giggles said...

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY Dear Lady!! May your year be filled with love, laughter, joy, new adventures and abundance!! You deserve the best life has to give!!!

So happy to see you dealing with your grief in such a positive way!! To see you finding the joy is heartwarming!!

It was shocking to discover I was lonely being married where as I have never been lonely since!

Beautiful happy artwork!! Hope all of your dreams come true!!

Thanks for sharing!! Have a wonderful bunch of celebrations!!

Hugs Giggles