I would love to post some wonderful new art work . . .
but the reality is -
I am in a bit of a slump lately.
I'm working on an order for a store -
and it's a lot of the "same" thing.
I'm still finding my routine in my new place -
when to walk the dog, when I need to leave to get my daughter to school, when to eat dinner . . .
you know - life.
I've had company, and committments, and obligations . . .
I just haven't had a lot of surplus time.
But here is painting I did about a year ago - and it seems appropriate for todays post.
Even though life is crazy busy - I have spent a lot of time thinking and comtemplating where I am today compared to where I was last year.
And I have started a mental list.
Here are a few of my thoughts . . .
1. Divorce is not a dirty word. It's not pretty, but sometimes it needs to happen.
2. Sometimes . . .in fact, more often than we realize - we pay the consequences for someone elses choices. So accept and deal.
3. Some things I will never understand - and understanding that simple principle is a great way to let go and move on.
4. It's ok to cry - just get it out and move on.
5. Being "alone" is not the same thing as being "lonely". And sometimes, we are very lonely when we are not alone.
6. I love cookie dough . . .cookies are ok. But I would rather eat the dough. Why is it considered bad to eat three cookies worth of dough - but no one would question if I ate the 3 cookies?
7. Cereal for dinner is ok - if is it ok for me to use it to fuel my entire day - why can't I have it in the evening? I like it better then anyway.
8. Nothing clears the head like getting out of the house.
9. Walks can be magical.
10. Pity and compassion are not the same thing.
11. I don't like to ask for help.
12. I need help.
13. When I ask for help - people give it!
14. I have amazing friends and family.
15. No matter how wonderful a person is . . .if I have change too much for them, they aren't worth it.
16. Sometimes, perfection has to wait. Not everyone is at the same place at the same time.
17. I don't like to wait - I am not a very patient person.
18. The universe is listening. God is listening.
19. Dreams can come true - but sometimes the way you get there is not what you were thinking.
20. Coulda Shoulda Woulda - fun to say - but not worth dwelling on.
21.Regardless of how bad it seems - I still have it pretty damn good.
22. Did I mention . . .I have awesome friends and family?
23. We are all mortal - including my parents.
24. Redefining "normal" can be fun!
25. I don't like watching television.
26. Reconnecting to the past helps remind you of where you want to go and who you really are.
27. Taking care of myself first is not being selfish.
28. It's ok to say no - and I don't owe anyone an explanation of why.
29. I'm a dog person - always have been, always will be - take it or leave it - but my dog lives in my home. He has every right to be there.
30. I NEED the ocean - at least every couple of months, I need to hear and see the ocean.
31. Being religious and being spiritual are not the same thing.
32. Supporting someone and trying to fix them are not the same thing - I have always tried to "fix" - but I am turning in my tool belt. I'll support you - but I am done trying to fix you.
33. I don't need to "call someone" to change a lightbulb or a vacuum cleaner belt or a tire, thank you very much.
34. I'm not very computer savvy - don't judge me for not knowing or understanding all the "terminology".
35. I can learn to do it - but sometimes I would rather just save myself the time and ask an expert. This does not make me weak or inept.
36. I have been bruised a little - but I am not, repeat NOT, broken!
37. I have never been drunk or stoned or strung out on anything. That doesn't mean I don't know how to have fun or haven't fully experienced life. It just means, I remember it! And I haven't thrown up as a result of it.
38. Why bother forgiving others if you can't forgive yourself?
39. I'm no longer ashamed for choices I made 30 years ago - they brought me to where I am today.
40. I like who I am today.
41. Age is irrelevant.
42. I have curves. I have stretch marks. I have a real body.
43. No matter how bad it seems . . .laughter helps.
44. Its scary to meet new people - It's awesome to meet new friends.
45. I love diet pepsi - the colder the better. And I prefer to drink it with a straw.
46. I'm not a huge fan of dark chocolate. I try to be a grownup and love it- but I'll take milk chocolate anyday. . .with nuts!
47. Being a grown-up is overrated. I would rather play, be silly and throw a little caution to the wind.
48. If I want to . . .I can! I don't need to let other peoples phobias or comfort level dictate what I do and experience.
49. I don't like to watch the news. I rarely read the paper and talking politics makes me anxious.
50. I LOVE MY LIFE RIGHT NOW.